Today is the first day of the dramatically drawn out, anxiety-ridden, obsessive, irrational behavior driven “two week wait” (TWW).
More specifically, it is the beginning of the luteal phase of my menstrual cycle. The first day after ovulation, when my body is preparing for pregnancy by thickening my uterine lining and increasing my estrogen and progesterone hormones to support our newly developed and rapidly growing baby. My egg should be fertilized by now and rolling on down my Fallopian tube in preparation for implantation. Yay!
It’s also the first cycle after our second chemical pregnancy (early miscarriage) which, according to many women on various TTC message boards, is the cycle when they got pregnant with their “sticky” baby; the pregnancy they were blessed to see through to birth. I read in an article that this may actually be true, that there’s a good chance of getting pregnant right after a miscarriage. God willing!
I am so hopeful for the blessing of new life in my womb! I’m praying God favors us for parenthood this month. I know His timing is divine and I trust His process.
Today I am not feeling the typical symptoms I feel around ovulation. No breast tenderness (which was also absent in the cycle after our first miscarriage) or ovulation pain/cramping. Well, I do feel some kind of cramping today but it’s different than what I usually feel around this time; it’s more like gas pains in the center of my lower pelvic area. My ovulation pain/cramping typically happens on either side of my pelvis and is noticeably sharp and uncomfortable. The atypical “symptoms” I’m having today are excessive fatigue (I have no idea why?!) and a touch of heartburn.
Right now, I’m not sure how I feel about the lack of breast tenderness. From what I’ve read, it occurs because of an increase in the fertility hormones (progesterone and estrogen), which are needed to support implantation. So, if I have no tenderness, do I not have adequate hormone levels? Is my body doing what it’s supposed to be doing?Am I gonna be able to have a “sticky” baby this cycle? What if…?
But, God. (Ephesians 3:20, Philippians 4:6-7, 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)
I’m only 1 day past/post ovulation (DPO), so I’m definitely overthinking it! There are plenty of women (plenty!) who have no symptoms at all during their TWW and they still get a Big Fat Positive (BFP). And, of course, symptoms aside, there’s God and His plan. Of course.
The hubster has insisted that I wait until at least 7 days past my cycle date to test for pregnancy. He doesn’t want to endure the heartache of another chemical pregnancy. I totally respect that and I understand his concern but I can’t (and didn’t) make any promises. I really can’t say with confidence that I will wait a full week after my missed period to test. But if I do test, I will just wait till another week has passed to tell him. Fair enough, I think.
Day 1 past ovulation down. Prayers up!